to trouble your mind with the childish design of how it all should go.

            This semester has honestly kicked my ass. Pardon my blunt language (sorry Grandmother,) but I honestly have not been able to see a light at the end of the tunnel until now. I sit here, the Sunday night before finals week, completely exhausted and proud of myself. I have worked hard and I think it finally shows off in my projects and photographs. Finals in art school are different than what my friends in the state universities suffered through. See, I do not need a textbook or notes to study. It does not all come down to one written final exam or a five paged report reflecting my knowledge from the course subjects. I have one assignment that is large enough to bring my grade from an A to an F by something simple as bad exposure. I have four bodies of work that reflect everything I am as an artist. Sometimes I think I would rather take the bookwork, but then I remember that I love what I do. My finals are painful, but they are completely worth it because through the blood, sweat, and tears, I am smiling.

            In Photoshop my final was to take eight different photographs and completely “fix” them. This means spotting and repairs, taking out tourists, replacing skies, coloring trees and mountains, turning roads into rivers, and ultimately creating a new image. I did most of mine from my time spent in Italy. One, because I am constantly feeling the need to go back, and secondly they needed a lot of work.

Firenze School Days, Before 

Firenze School Days, After

            For my Composition for the Artist class I wrote an art review about Cristobal Hara’s photograph: N1 Alava, Province Spain, 1995. It was nice to focus in on one particular piece and dissect the hell out of it. It also improved my own photographs because now I look at each one and decide what it all means and what will my audience get from it. The following is an excerpt from my essay titled:  “Blood Red and Slightly Tainted.”

            Death is unavoidably attractive. It sparks curiosity, heightens all five senses, and pulls unforgivable emotions forward. N1 Alava, Province Spain, 1995, by Cristobal Hara, is a “highly evocative” (Howarth & McLaren, 77) photograph of the minutes following a fatal car accident. The centered vehicle, flipped over, horizontally frames the death of a young man trapped inside, while a woman reacts only feet away from her bloody passenger seat. The choice whether or not to help or click the shutter as a spectator is a tantalizing decision for a photographer. Does one capture for documentation/art and risk a life or future negative repercussions or do you let the perfect shot slide out of frame because it is the “ethical” choice to make? It is unclear whether or not Cristobal Hara approached the victims of the accident before or after taking the photograph, but his choice to capture the moment as a quiet observer approaching the scene sealed the emotional impact of the tragic event in a subdued manner. Hara’s use of subject matter, perspective, and color, generates an overwhelming sense of loss and a respectful gesture of privacy.

N1 Alava, Province Spain 1995 by Cristobal Hara

            Visualization brought the most creativity. With an open concept requirement I developed “Paper Faces.” While studying, living, and thriving, in Firenze, I learned the importance of body language through the Italians boisterous hand movements and my desperate need to communicate with a foreign tongue I only knew vaguely. It was during this time that I developed a fascination with the human body and human interactions. I became obsessed with observing people; loosing time in coffee shops to watching the customers come and go, taking note on how they stir their coffees or the detail in their wrinkled hands, and writing on sticky notes about how the boy next to me had an eyebrow that resembled that of shower curtain rod because of the ten plus ringed piercings that lined it.
            What I have learned is that facial expressions are the ultimate form of non- verbal communication as well as one of the most evident descriptions of our personalities. Whether it the natural part in your lips or the squint of your eyes when giggling, your face articulates emotions. So what happens if we remove all of that? Then what does your face say about you? Ultimately, that is the answer I searched for with the creation of “Paper Faces.”

            After sending out mass messages on various social media networks, calling all friends/enemies/met you oncer’s, and pulling random people out of the hallway, I ended up with twenty four individuals willing to model.             Over two days, the only light source being a large soft box, I photographed each person as if I was shooting a mug shot: please face me; now please turn for a profile. I did not ask them to do anything particular, wear anything special, or even brush their hair. I merely sang, “Come As You Are” by Nirvana.

            I edited each image to black and white, printed them, and played a game of matchmaker putting together his profile with her forward, her forward with her forward, his profile facing away from his profile, and so on, until I came up with a match for everyone and as many different combinations as possible. Taking the twenty-four couples, I narrowed it down to the best thirteen, in which I removed the face from each individual using an Exacto knife, a handful of patients, and a few Peanut M&M’s.

            The final step was to find a collection of different pieces of text (from magazines, books, newspapers, etc.) and pair it up with the coupled pairs, replacing their face with the words of someone else, and as an end result giving them a new personality. I took SF Weekly & the Guardian on Wednesday; thrift store shopped on Polk Street Thursday afternoon, and begged my friends to give me their old novels on Friday.

            I ripped pages, cut sides, and pasted carefully each text behind an anonymous headshot. The text, to me, was to replace one way of communication with another. After removing the face, the only way to know who these people are and what they are like is by their clothing, posture, and what the text tells us to think. Today most of society’s communication is done through emails, phone messages, letters, and so on. Have we lost our personalities because we no longer need face-to-face responses to communicate ideas? “Paper Faces” address the importance of facial features and expressions while highlighting the dangerous media repercussions our society faces with a growing number in advancing technology.

            *The final has yet to be re-photographed and made digital.

headshot sorting. 

removal of the faces.  

matchmaking. 

            Quality of light was my technical class of the semester. For every artistic choice you wanted to create, there was a rhyme, reason, and three strobe lights to do it. It was this class that I spent long nights and never ending days in the studio. I cannot complain, but I missed a lot of sunlight and fresh air because of the class – I can tell you that honestly and my skin is pale enough to stand as an example. For my final I was asked to create twelve studio portraits with at least eight different lighting styles. There had to be a simple concept to flow it together so I chose “black and white.” Although this one was not as much thought, it was a lot of work. I have to thank everyone who put in time to help me out. Thank you to my models (those of you I know and those of you I met briefly.) Alicea and Jasmine were my go to girls the entire semester. And most importantly Alex and Nic – without whom I would of probably knocked myself out with a boom or set the seamless on fire.

Tom Baboin, No Contrast Lighting

Alexander McNally, Rembrant & Backlight (Jesus LIghting) 

            The end of this semester doesn’t just mark the end of my full year at the Academy, but also the end of my time staying at the dorms (praise Jesus.) I have been incredibly lucky. My room was perfectly sized and had a lovely view down on the busy Sutter Street. I had two (& a half - Love you Phoebe) charming roommates. I couldn’t of asked for a better group of girls to start my adventure here with. We laughed way too much in room 501 and I will miss that. But goodness, I will not miss sharing my bathroom with thirty girls who don’t know how to dye their hair without dying the wall. Showering without flip-flops? I forgot what that was like. Let’s not even talk about the kitchen and worse – the café food. BUT overall, I am thankful for this learning experience and memories made at old Howard Brodie.

Kayleigh, trying to pack herself up on a Tuesday night.  

            Going home to Salt Lake City will be a heat wave. Not only is the temperature already twenty degrees hotter than it is here, but also I will be working as a breakfast waitress again at The Market Street Grill Downtown (so come and visit.) I will also be taking two online classes and hopefully receive an internship/volunteer opportunity through SLC Photo Collective. Then of course the minutes in between all of that I will be playing hard with my family, closing Coffee Garden with countless conversations, and dancing hard at the Twilight Concerts. See you there?

Fog from Caleb & Shawn on Vimeo.

This is a little video I stumbled upon. Not only is it breathtaking to watch, but the song ("Gracious" by Ben Howard) is my recent addiction. (Also, the lyrics are the title of this post.)  Enjoy. 

http://vimeo.com/57878898 

Have a wonderful week & wish me luck. Ciao, Ciao.